Growing up in a world where technology has slowly started to take over can be scary sometimes. When I was a kid I didn't have the internet, we also didn't have cable, and Facebook didn't exist! Now I know cable was available and dial up internet came around when I was a little older but I spent all of my time outside with friends. I didn't watch TV nearly as much as I do now and honestly I can say I am sure my kids will watch more TV then they need to. With all of this technology it is easy to be afraid. I know it will be easy for my kids to access the internet and as much as I will use parental controls I also know kids get smarter then the controls. (I remember a friend growing up who had a lock on her TV and when I was at her house she used to turn it off so we could watch TV when her parents weren't home) I just have to trust that I am going to be a parent who talks to her kids and explains situations maybe earlier then I am ready to.
So on one hand I am terrified of raising our son in this crazy internet driven world, on the other I am glad. I can talk all night about the scary things I see happening or the situations that could arise or I can look at the positives. For example: My husband is currently out of town for the weekend. Tonight my iPhone rang and when I picked it up I saw it was my husband but I could see myself on the screen. The screen said, "Facetime". I got to talk and see my husband over our iPhones. Now I know this isn't a new thing but it's the first time we have used it. I loved being able to physically see him. This got me to thinking about having our son and if one of us isn't home we have an option to still see him and let him see us. Also I have family who lives a couple of hours away. It's great to know with today's technology we can "Skype" and they can watch Lincoln grow up over a web cam.
Basically I feel like I am lucky to raise a kid in this scary world because there will be so many benefits and so much that I wish we had when I was a kid.
I just have to be a diligent parent and not give up my parenting to the internet and TV.
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Friday, April 13, 2012
Saturday, April 7, 2012
33 weeks and 3 days. Only 6 weeks and 4 days to go!
Only 6 weeks and 4 days til my due date! That is only 46 days.
John and I have made a lot of progress with getting stuff done however there is still a lot to do. I realize no matter what I will never be 100% ready for Lincoln to be here but at the same time I am just want him here now. I am not scared anymore I know we will make great parents. I am more and more anxious the more I think about finally meeting this little boy who has been growing inside me for about 7 months now! We have this connection when he kicks me. Almost like he is saying good morning or he wants something (like for me to roll over when I am sleeping). Watching John with this has been amazing. I know they say, "A mother becomes a mother when she finds out she is pregnant, a father becomes a father when he holds his baby", but I honestly don't believe that. John has been so supportive and is always talking about Lincoln and how much he loves him. The look on his face when he feels Lincoln kick is just the most amazing look. I can already tell this bond between John and his son will be amazing and unbreakable. I just can't wait to see John hold him for the first time!
So at 33 weeks I am huge and uncomfortable most of the time. I love it and I hate it! I can't sleep a full night anymore. I also am a lot slower moving around. I can't wait to get my body back so I can return to my normal activities. I plan on returning to the kickball field for our summer season which is so exciting and also scary at the same time but I know I can do it! Lincoln will be at our games to cheer us on! :)
Here are some recent pics of my belly :) I am sure I will have another update soon especially after my baby showers!
John and I have made a lot of progress with getting stuff done however there is still a lot to do. I realize no matter what I will never be 100% ready for Lincoln to be here but at the same time I am just want him here now. I am not scared anymore I know we will make great parents. I am more and more anxious the more I think about finally meeting this little boy who has been growing inside me for about 7 months now! We have this connection when he kicks me. Almost like he is saying good morning or he wants something (like for me to roll over when I am sleeping). Watching John with this has been amazing. I know they say, "A mother becomes a mother when she finds out she is pregnant, a father becomes a father when he holds his baby", but I honestly don't believe that. John has been so supportive and is always talking about Lincoln and how much he loves him. The look on his face when he feels Lincoln kick is just the most amazing look. I can already tell this bond between John and his son will be amazing and unbreakable. I just can't wait to see John hold him for the first time!
So at 33 weeks I am huge and uncomfortable most of the time. I love it and I hate it! I can't sleep a full night anymore. I also am a lot slower moving around. I can't wait to get my body back so I can return to my normal activities. I plan on returning to the kickball field for our summer season which is so exciting and also scary at the same time but I know I can do it! Lincoln will be at our games to cheer us on! :)
Here are some recent pics of my belly :) I am sure I will have another update soon especially after my baby showers!
Friday, March 30, 2012
week 32 Lincoln Michael-Eugene Miller
So it's only been about a week since my last post but I have so much to share!Last Thursday John and I boarded our plane to sunny, Playa Del Carmen, Mexico. It was an amazing few days to get away and enjoy some hot weather and some wonderful sunshine! I thought I would share some of our pics to start.
relaxing in the jacuzzi tub on our balcony
John and I going to dinner
31 weeks pregnant headed to the beach
Our little family on the beach! :)
getting a fish pedicure
enjoying some coconut milk in town
John and I all formal for dinner
Lincoln and mommy soaking up some sun by the pool
Laying in a cabana by the beach
Our trip was AMAZING. John and I relaxed and enjoyed our trip. On our way home I was pretty miserable with the flight and sitting for so long. We first had to fly to Houston where my feet began to swell, then the long flight over to Portland. After we landed I officially had what can only be described as elephant feet!
Here is a pic of my feet the day after the flight home.
It was a rough time flying home but well worth it in the end. When we landed in Houston we got some sad news that John's grandpa suffered cardiac arrest the day we left and hadn't woken up. Sadly this week we gathered with family to say goodbye to a great man. John's grandpa passed away Wednesday evening but we got to be there and tell him how much we will miss him and how mush we love him. During all of this I was a little dehydrated and also under enough stress that I started to have contractions Wednesday afternoon. Luckily John was there to get me to the hospital and with some fluids in me and some medications we got the contractions stopped before I dilated or before my water broke!
It was an interesting day for the whole family. The good news was being able to stop labor so Lincoln can cook a little longer.
With John's grandpa passing we have also made a decision to make an adjustment to his name. We decided to add a second middle name to Lincoln so we could honor Grandpa Gene.
Lincoln Michael-Eugene Miller should hopefully be here in a little less then 8 weeks. However I am feeling like he will be here a couple weeks early! Take my poll on the right hand side of the page. Do you think Lincoln will be early, late, or just on time! :)
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
31 weeks today!
I can't believe in 9 short weeks we are expecting newest addition to the Miller family! John and I have been waiting for this day since before this pregnancy started! Since the day I met John it seems like we have been talking and dreaming of starting our family. John is everything I have ever wanted in a husband and father for my kids! Getting pregnant didn't come as easy as it does for most. We actually got pregnant shortly before we got engaged. I had been switching to a different birth control at that time and started getting super sick. I dropped a bunch of weight and was just miserable. I decided to take a pregnancy test and was shocked to see it was positive. I freaked and after a week of knowing I was pregnant I finally told John. Now I imagined the worst reaction out of him and knew we were going to have a lot to talk about but really the reaction I got was pure joy and excitement. John told me I am everything he wanted in a wife and mother for his children and he wanted a family with me!
Sadly a week later I suffered a miscarriage. I was devastated but at the same time we both thought about it and realized we wanted to plan a baby and we needed more time to grow as a couple and possibly even get married.
About 2 months later John proposed to me on his birthday. John and I started planning a wedding and well the thought of having a baby was always on our minds.
Around 6 months before the wedding John and I discussed going off birth control to prepare for having children after our wedding. So we discussed it and decided it was what we wanted. Every month I was prepared to see that I could be pregnant but every month my wonderful period came and went like normal. We weren't really "trying" to get pregnant but we weren't "not trying" either.
The wedding came and I swear that night we were both so ready to say we were actually trying to get pregnant! That month came and went and still no luck. At this point I had been off of any kind of birth control for about 8 months. The month after our wedding we went to Mexico for a work trip/honeymoon! Well a little vacation is JUST what we needed because shortly after coming home I got my positive test! John and I were probably the happiest people in the world! So ready to start a family and excited to know we were going to have a baby. I had my first doctor appointment and everything was looking good!
At 8 weeks I was getting stuff ready for a BBQ we were having for John's birthday. I would be about 9 weeks on his birthday and every day was rough. I was sick all the time and that morning I had some weird cramping. On John's birthday I woke up and found I had some bloody discharge happening. I was terrified that something was wrong. I called my doctor office several times and each time they told me some spotting was normal and to call if I had cramps or if the bleeding increased. I didn't feel any cramps and it was so light with bleeding that I relaxed a bit and went on with the BBQ. John knew something was up but he knew I was also staying positive. The next morning I was in a little cramping pain and the bleeding was increasing. I called the doctor and she got me in for an emergency ultrasound. At the ultrasound we were both trying to stay positive and just hoping our baby was okay. The ultrasound tech started the ultrasound and pointed out the head and body to us. I was feeling like everything was okay. Then I saw the hardest thing I have ever seen. I saw the little chest and what looked like a little heart. I also noticed the heart wasn't moving or beating. The tech didn't say anything. She shut off the machine and asked us to wait in the room. I broke down. I had wanted this baby so bad and I really thought we were having a baby! My doctor called me on the phone in the room shortly after and explained they didn't see a heart beat. She said she was so sorry for our loss and that I should go home and rest.
That weekend my body was weak and I was in such pain. My body wasn't taking care of the miscarriage like normal so I had to go in and have a D and C to remove the baby so my body could start to heal.
My husband cried that night, and well John never cry's.
We had to wait a few months for my body to return to normal so we could try getting pregnant again. We were really trying to hold it together but in my mind we had had 2 miscarriages so at this point I was scared when we did get pregnant we would just lose it again. We started trying to get pregnant again and I was so excited but so scared at the same time. John and I got pregnant this time after only 2 short months of trying. I remember taking a test right before we went on a date. The 2nd line was so faint I just threw it away thinking it had to be a false positive. After a week and a missed period I went back and took a new test. I saw the 2 lines but I got really mad. Why am I getting false positives?!?! UHHG I was so upset. So I took another test, it was also positive. At this point I went to grab John. I made him look at the test and I will never forget the look on his face! He had the biggest smile. I started to cry I was so happy.
Now this time I was so skeptical that it would end in a miscarriage that we decided not to share our news. It still felt so unreal and I wasn't have horrible sickness. I felt nauseated but nothing like I had felt in the past. We planned on keeping it a secret until I was in my 2nd trimester.
However my cousin and his wife called to tell me they were pregnant when I was around 8 weeks. I could tell they were worried about my reaction due to the losses I had suffered so I had to tell them my own great news. From there I had to tell my mom and we had to tell the rest of our family.
It felt good to tell people but I was so scared it was right before I had lost the last baby and I was scared we wouldn't make it past that point.
I made it to 12 weeks and I was getting excited because we made it past our previous losses and I was only a couple of weeks til my 2nd trimester. I woke up around 2:30 am I had fallen asleep on the couch and John was playing video games in the living room. I had to pee so I got up and went to the bathroom. After going to the bathroom I turned around and saw my worst fears coming true all over again. I saw bright red blood in the toilet. I was bleeding. I remember sitting in the bathroom on the floor just silent preparing myself for the worst. John came to find me and he just hugged me and told me it would be okay. The next day the bleeding had stopped but it was Sunday so I was waiting until Monday to go in to the doctor. When I talked to my doctor she had told me to come in first thing in the morning and she kept saying how sorry she was. I just KNEW we were losing our baby again. It was killing me inside.
Well Monday morning we got up and went to the doctor. I hadn't been bleeding or cramping so I felt like that was a good sign. The doctor jumped right in and looked at the ultrasound first. I saw our little baby looking more like a baby everyday. I then saw the greatest thing ever...the baby moved. The little arm moved and then the body. I saw a beautiful little heart beat and my doctor said well it looks like everything is just fine!
Our baby continued to grow into the 2nd trimester...and then the 3rd. We are now at week 31...
Week 31!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe we are actually 9 weeks away from having our beautiful baby boy in our arms!
It's been quite a journey but I am so happy with how things turned out. I have been married to my wonderful husband for 1 year and a couple months and we will have our baby boy in 9 weeks!
Well this turned into the longest post I have written but I just had so many details I wanted to share. Thank you everyone for reading. Now I have to finish packing up for our little Mexican vacation that we leave for in the morning. At 31 weeks pregnant I cant wait to relax and enjoy some nice weather with my husband before our little man is here! :)
Sadly a week later I suffered a miscarriage. I was devastated but at the same time we both thought about it and realized we wanted to plan a baby and we needed more time to grow as a couple and possibly even get married.
About 2 months later John proposed to me on his birthday. John and I started planning a wedding and well the thought of having a baby was always on our minds.
Around 6 months before the wedding John and I discussed going off birth control to prepare for having children after our wedding. So we discussed it and decided it was what we wanted. Every month I was prepared to see that I could be pregnant but every month my wonderful period came and went like normal. We weren't really "trying" to get pregnant but we weren't "not trying" either.
The wedding came and I swear that night we were both so ready to say we were actually trying to get pregnant! That month came and went and still no luck. At this point I had been off of any kind of birth control for about 8 months. The month after our wedding we went to Mexico for a work trip/honeymoon! Well a little vacation is JUST what we needed because shortly after coming home I got my positive test! John and I were probably the happiest people in the world! So ready to start a family and excited to know we were going to have a baby. I had my first doctor appointment and everything was looking good!
At 8 weeks I was getting stuff ready for a BBQ we were having for John's birthday. I would be about 9 weeks on his birthday and every day was rough. I was sick all the time and that morning I had some weird cramping. On John's birthday I woke up and found I had some bloody discharge happening. I was terrified that something was wrong. I called my doctor office several times and each time they told me some spotting was normal and to call if I had cramps or if the bleeding increased. I didn't feel any cramps and it was so light with bleeding that I relaxed a bit and went on with the BBQ. John knew something was up but he knew I was also staying positive. The next morning I was in a little cramping pain and the bleeding was increasing. I called the doctor and she got me in for an emergency ultrasound. At the ultrasound we were both trying to stay positive and just hoping our baby was okay. The ultrasound tech started the ultrasound and pointed out the head and body to us. I was feeling like everything was okay. Then I saw the hardest thing I have ever seen. I saw the little chest and what looked like a little heart. I also noticed the heart wasn't moving or beating. The tech didn't say anything. She shut off the machine and asked us to wait in the room. I broke down. I had wanted this baby so bad and I really thought we were having a baby! My doctor called me on the phone in the room shortly after and explained they didn't see a heart beat. She said she was so sorry for our loss and that I should go home and rest.
That weekend my body was weak and I was in such pain. My body wasn't taking care of the miscarriage like normal so I had to go in and have a D and C to remove the baby so my body could start to heal.
My husband cried that night, and well John never cry's.
We had to wait a few months for my body to return to normal so we could try getting pregnant again. We were really trying to hold it together but in my mind we had had 2 miscarriages so at this point I was scared when we did get pregnant we would just lose it again. We started trying to get pregnant again and I was so excited but so scared at the same time. John and I got pregnant this time after only 2 short months of trying. I remember taking a test right before we went on a date. The 2nd line was so faint I just threw it away thinking it had to be a false positive. After a week and a missed period I went back and took a new test. I saw the 2 lines but I got really mad. Why am I getting false positives?!?! UHHG I was so upset. So I took another test, it was also positive. At this point I went to grab John. I made him look at the test and I will never forget the look on his face! He had the biggest smile. I started to cry I was so happy.
Now this time I was so skeptical that it would end in a miscarriage that we decided not to share our news. It still felt so unreal and I wasn't have horrible sickness. I felt nauseated but nothing like I had felt in the past. We planned on keeping it a secret until I was in my 2nd trimester.
However my cousin and his wife called to tell me they were pregnant when I was around 8 weeks. I could tell they were worried about my reaction due to the losses I had suffered so I had to tell them my own great news. From there I had to tell my mom and we had to tell the rest of our family.
It felt good to tell people but I was so scared it was right before I had lost the last baby and I was scared we wouldn't make it past that point.
I made it to 12 weeks and I was getting excited because we made it past our previous losses and I was only a couple of weeks til my 2nd trimester. I woke up around 2:30 am I had fallen asleep on the couch and John was playing video games in the living room. I had to pee so I got up and went to the bathroom. After going to the bathroom I turned around and saw my worst fears coming true all over again. I saw bright red blood in the toilet. I was bleeding. I remember sitting in the bathroom on the floor just silent preparing myself for the worst. John came to find me and he just hugged me and told me it would be okay. The next day the bleeding had stopped but it was Sunday so I was waiting until Monday to go in to the doctor. When I talked to my doctor she had told me to come in first thing in the morning and she kept saying how sorry she was. I just KNEW we were losing our baby again. It was killing me inside.
Well Monday morning we got up and went to the doctor. I hadn't been bleeding or cramping so I felt like that was a good sign. The doctor jumped right in and looked at the ultrasound first. I saw our little baby looking more like a baby everyday. I then saw the greatest thing ever...the baby moved. The little arm moved and then the body. I saw a beautiful little heart beat and my doctor said well it looks like everything is just fine!
Our baby continued to grow into the 2nd trimester...and then the 3rd. We are now at week 31...
Week 31!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe we are actually 9 weeks away from having our beautiful baby boy in our arms!
It's been quite a journey but I am so happy with how things turned out. I have been married to my wonderful husband for 1 year and a couple months and we will have our baby boy in 9 weeks!
Well this turned into the longest post I have written but I just had so many details I wanted to share. Thank you everyone for reading. Now I have to finish packing up for our little Mexican vacation that we leave for in the morning. At 31 weeks pregnant I cant wait to relax and enjoy some nice weather with my husband before our little man is here! :)
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
3d Ultrasound with pics!
So we ended up going 4 times to try to get the best 3D shots possible. It was difficult because Lincoln likes his hands on his face, the placenta is also something he likes to use to block his face, and well I am still not very big for how pregnant I am and well there isn't a whole lot of fluid in there. So here are a few of our pics to share! Some of them may be kinda hard to tell what they are but most of them you can see whats going on! :)
I hope you all enjoy looking through our photos. I honestly can't wait to see what he looks like in person!
a 2D shot of Lincoln's face
An arm
His eye looks like it's open
hand on the face
his tongue is out :)
in deep thought
Our handsome little man!
Any one who knows my husband should agree...This looks so much like John and has his mouth!
perfect like his daddy!
sleepy baby!
he has that tongue out again!
Lincoln Michael Miller <3
side profile
his heart beat and heart
trying to get comfortable
he was probably tired of being poked at all morning!
John breaths a huge sigh of relief!
The Tebow pose. lol
Hiding
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Jessica Simpson on Elle....
It makes me so happy to see a woman who has struggled with body image bare all to show how beautiful pregnancy really is.
I read that Jessica has gained nearly 70 lbs with this baby and the fact that she is still willing to show off her body while pregnant makes me want to do it also! I have booked a maternity boudoir shoot with a photographer friend of mine, Lisa Larson. I want to capture my pregnancy in a beautiful and intimate way so I can look back and remember the beauty that is in pregnancy.
I can't wait to share photos from my shoot.
I recommend any pregnant woman to get some beautiful and tasteful pictures to look back on.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Ultrasound and doctor appointment....
John and I went back this morning for our 3D ultrasound hoping to get good pics of our baby boy! The first time on Saturday, Lincoln was doing the Tebow and covering his face so we rescheduled. This time he was a lot easier to see but the placenta was in the way. After another hour of moving and drinking orange juice it was clear we would have to try again. So we will return Friday for take 3 and I hope to have pictures to show after that! :)
We also had another doctor appointment today to check on baby and how he is growing. I also had to check my glucose to see if I am at risk of gestational diabetes. I actually failed the test by 2 points but since I had been at the ultrasound and drank some orange juice and had a square of chocolate they let me slide and passed me anyway! :)
I start to see Dr. Sargent every 2 weeks now that I am in my 3rd trimester which is exciting but also a little overkill if you ask me. I guess I would rather go in every 2 weeks and have them be short visits then to not and find out I needed to be monitored for something.
The good news is everything is looking fabulous and John and I are getting more and more excited for Lincoln to join our family. It is still hard to believe sometimes that we are going to have a son in a little over 11 weeks. I love my growing family and I can't wait to meet Lincoln!
Here is me at 28 weeks! :)
We also had another doctor appointment today to check on baby and how he is growing. I also had to check my glucose to see if I am at risk of gestational diabetes. I actually failed the test by 2 points but since I had been at the ultrasound and drank some orange juice and had a square of chocolate they let me slide and passed me anyway! :)
I start to see Dr. Sargent every 2 weeks now that I am in my 3rd trimester which is exciting but also a little overkill if you ask me. I guess I would rather go in every 2 weeks and have them be short visits then to not and find out I needed to be monitored for something.
The good news is everything is looking fabulous and John and I are getting more and more excited for Lincoln to join our family. It is still hard to believe sometimes that we are going to have a son in a little over 11 weeks. I love my growing family and I can't wait to meet Lincoln!
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